He crept from the bed, careful to keep the covers undisturbed. She shifted slightly as he stood, but did not wake.
He went about preparing for his day in a silence broken only by the sizzling of breakfast. He perused the paper as he ate. After, he deposited the dishes in the sink when he finished, being sure to give them a quick rinse.
Before leaving, he returned to the bedroom. Bending over, he gave her lips a kiss that was as light and warm as the sunbeams that were just beginning to stream through the cracks in the blinds.
OK, so this is less "copyeditor" and more "editor editor". Feel free to tell me to FOAD.
ReplyDeleteThe metaphor in the last paragraph is awesome, but doesn't seem in keeping with the realistic descriptions in the rest of the piece.